6 years already

six years ago today, my gram passed away. the only grandparent i can really remember (my pop pop, her husband, died when i was in 1st or 2nd grade). it’s hard to believe it’s already been 6 years. at the same time, it’s hard to believer it’s only been 6 years. i miss her a lot. for the first 3 years, i thought i saw her – perhaps just glimpses of her – everywhere i looked. 


i still remember my weekly "sleep overs" with her before i moved across the country. i’d go visit her after work. she’d make me dinner. i’d clean the dishes and her bathroom. then we’d play games – Parcheesi and/or Rummikub, watch a movie and go to bed. She’d pack me a lunch (of left overs) the next morning and I’d go to the office. 


when she passed away, i inherited a few things: my pop pop’s coo-coo clock and my gram’s wooden spoon. my cousin, janet, inherited the much-coveted schoolhouse cookie jar:

i will NEVER forget about this cookie jar. it usually had Chips A’hoy chocolate chip cookies in it – my FAVORITE cookies as a kid. 


she never met any of my kids. (samantha is named after my pop-pop – he was Samuel James) but i am thankful – oh, so very thankful, that she was able to attend my wedding. to meet my husband (and she granted much approval over him!). and that i was able to spend some time with her in her final days.




4 thoughts on “6 years already

  1. Made me cry to read that. I miss her more than I can say as well. She was truely an amazing woman who loved each of us individually and without consequence. She did get to see Daniel (her youngest grand child at the time) just before she died…that meant everything to me. This cookie jar is kept on my counter and is looked at everyday. It is hard to believe that it has been 6 years. I often find strength from her when I need it.

  2. I loved that cookie jar, too, and I am so glad you have it and it brings back fond memories. I don’t know where I would be today if it had not been for Gram’s encouragement. I remember when I went through a very dark period of my life, Gram gave me a poem called “Don’t Quit”. (http://www.thedontquitpoem.com/thePoem.htm). That helped me to get through that time and was the beginning of turning my heart toward God. She was the bright spot in my childhood. She was an anchor, someone I could count on to love me when it felt like no one did. I loved her so much and she will always be a part of who I am.

  3. loved that cookie jar and all it held. yummm. gram is one of two women who have loved me always (aunt sara’s the other) without judgement or strings attached, whether i was naughty or nice, warts and all. i see her a lot in my dreams and i always hug her, then wake up alone and crying. my heart hurts so much right now just thinking of all of my cousins who have also lost the best gram who ever lived, and to think that you guys hurt, really sucks. i wish i had some magic words to make it better, but i’m not gram, so i don’t. i miss her rocking me, the last time she did that i was 26! i was a little big for her, but she rocked me anyway cuz i was sad. she made it all better. love you guys.

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